Government Bus (One bad encounter)

It was a moony night. I was travelling in a government bus from bangalore to my home town. Two girls were sitting left to me.

Two things to be noted:

1. I had encountered lot of girls in my college days. And i had never bothered about them. But now... I feel compunctious for that. Everything got changed. My college days got over. I got my posting in Bangalore. And here, I couldn't find a girl friend! Not even a single girl bothers about me (except for the office maid servant who gives me three cups of any "non-alcoholic" drink of my choice daily). I was desperate to have a cup of coffee with a girl, to schmooze with a girl and to have a girl friend by my side. I tried all possibilities to do the same, but, all proved futile.

2. After careful observation of my comportment, I found out that I had this grotesquerie habit of turning my head to the other side or downwards when a beautiful girl crosses me as though to show everyone indirectly that "Hey... I'm a good guy! I don't get bewitched towards beautiful females". I also found out that majority of the teenagers do the same when they confront the opposite sex. Little did i/they know that none was bothered about that.

Coming to the crux, I badly needed a girl to love. And I wanted to get out of this weird habit mentioned in point 2. So I was thinking of a solution. Suddenly an idea flashed.

Now these girls sitting on my left side were pretty good. I wanted to talk to them. So I turned my head towards the left and started staring (sighting!) at the girl near to me. Two things added fuel to stare at her more passionately:

• The boring film screened in the bus
  
• The thirst to spend the next four hours interestingly

After two hours of continuous gaping (includes occasional turning of head to the other side to reduce the pain caused in the neck) she caught sight of me. She smiled at me. I felt bliss.(Yeah! Ignorance is bliss)

After formal introductions, we didn't know what to speak. I remember watching a film - "School for Scoundrels" in which protagonist would say that you've to lie, lie again and again in order to woo a girl. My inner conscience started telling "LIE! Start lying!" Following was the conversation that occurred after that...

Conscience: Lie!
Me: You're beautiful...
Girl: (blinks)
Cons: Lie!
Me: Why? Are you doubtful?
Girl: No.. No.. Thanks for the commendation.
Cons: Good. Now lie again...
Me: How do I look like?
Girl: You are handsome.
Cons: Now she started lying :-)
Me: It's boring. Can we speak something?
Girl: Sure.
Me: So which dish do you like?
Girl: All sea foods... Prawn curry especially.
Cons: Sucks... Err... Sorry... Lie! Lie again...
Me: Oh great! Even I like those... The fins of prawn would be really delicious.
Girl: Prawns don't have fins.
Cons: She caught you!
Me: Oh really... I meant the other sea foods then.
Girl: Actually I'm a vegetarian.. I simply bluffed to see what you answer :-)
Cons: Man... This girl is really smart. Now.. Lie! Lie again!
Me: Ha ha ha... That was a good comedy! Appreciate your sense of humor..
Girl: So you're a vegetarian right?
Me: (Grinning) Yes.. How did you know?
Girl: It's written on your face.
Me: So you know face reading... Cool... Great!
Cons: Hey... Hey... I asked you to lie... not to flatter her.. Why are you behaving like the way you pose in front of your boss? L... I... E... The word is LIE... Can you hear that? Now... DO IT!
Girl: So... what else?
Me: What is your hobby?
Girl: I like my pets!
Me: Even i like them.. I have a German shepherd in my home.
Girl: No... I hate dogs like those. I basically like indian dogs.
Cons: (laughs at me)
Me: Hmmm... Actually I was the heart throb of all girls in my college.
Girl: Really?
Cons: Hey girl! You can't believe it right? Neither can I!
Me: Ha ha ha... I was kidding!
Girl: I know! Poor joke!
Me: ?!
(There was a brief pause)
Girl: So... Mr Heartthrob? What mood out ah?
Me: No... Not even a little. Why would i get angry with a beautiful girl like you?
Girl: So you like me?

I got stunned. Now you have two answers how I would've reacted.

ANSWER 1: (The good answer)
Me: Yes... I like you. I like the girl sitting next to you. I like the girl in front of you. I like all girls.
Cons: zzzz!!! (sleeping)
Girl: Great! But I love you...
Me: Hmmm... That was bit transparent.
Girl: It was nice of you to say that you like me. Anyways... What I said was for fun.
Me: ?!

ANSWER 2: (The bad answer)
Me: Yes... I like you. I love you.
Girl: Hmmm... I am getting engaged next week. Here's my invitation. You must come...
Me: ?!

In both cases, the girl outwitted me. Not knowing what to do, I started to write it as a story in my blog. And here you've finished reading the same.

PS1: Frankly admitting... Neither did i win in getting a girl friend nor did i change the so called weird habit. The above said story is purely out of my imagination and nothing occurred exactly the way i had mentioned. What exactly happened was, after she found out that I had been staring at her, she called her boy friend who was sitting in the front seat and I quietly escaped the scene!

PS2: (Am serious now) Dear girls... I love you all!